The view from up here is becoming more beautiful!

I have been living in a bubble for nearly 7 months! An ill bubble, a sad bubble, an unconfident bubble, a whole sphere of being and feeling sorry to my family and friends for the situation, as well as being angry that my life had been stolen by a huge monster of an illness. Thankfully this experience has taught me so much about myself and I generally feel like this was given to me to change my way of thinking and to make me appreciate what I do have opposed to what I don’t have. 

Since posting last there has been more change.. surprise surprise. My hair is falling out massively and will continue to fall for six week (so the nurse says), I could quite possibly be bald in that time. If there is anyone that has been through treatment and knows more about how to treat the hair growth process and how long it takes to stop falling out, please do contact me and let me know I would be grateful. 

More importantly I have begun holding the plank morning and night to begin strengthening my weaker muscles and to correct my poor typical ‘ill’ posture I have adopted (slumped/rounded kyphotic shoulders and upper back). This in itself is a massive positive for me, it means my body is in recovery and mending well and I can get myself in the gym very soon.

Last week I experienced extreme stomach cramps (six days after treatment) the pains were inbetween my diaphragm and belly button. It felt like a mixture of wind cramps and burning. I took Lansoprosol when I felt the feeling appear and I drank lots of honey and water… I swear by minouka honey now! I knew I wasn’t constipated because I had been to the toilet, however I read that this was normal after having ABVD. The on call doctor recommended I took cocodamol and buscopan together. Even though the cocodomal made me feel drowsy the two medicines did ease the pain. Eventually the pain went after two whole days.

I wanted to mention this as my reading and research lead me to believe a lot of people that undergo ABVD experience stomach discomfort and therefore, I wanted to explain what procedure I took to get rid of it. It’s important to mention that I also drank a lot of fluids, not many fizzy drinks, but diluted juices as water doesn’t taste good after treatment…STAY HYDRATED! 

So, right now I am currently on an 8 week break from treatment. I have already been back to the hospital as I found a few lumps in my groin and neck, but my doctor is not concerned and asked me to keep an eye of the size of them. I felt a little bit like a hypochondriac going to the doctor, but for my own peace of mind I needed to know that it was ok and that I didn’t need to worry. I hear that many people become so anxious about getting cancer back again after getting the all clear. I hope I find a way of avoiding anxiety over my health.  I get my results from the pet scan on the 15th September – fingers and toes crossed I get the ALL CLEAR! 

I have just started to feel ‘me’ again. Last night I went out with friends for the first time for cocktails and it’s safe to say I still have that groove on the dance floor!! I am also loving the wig at the moment. My natural hair is so fine that seeing my bald head is not very glam for a night out. I am also going back to work next week for a few hours a day and I think I will make an appearance in the gym too. 

It just goes to show when you think you CANT you DO and there is ALWAYS light at the end of a DARK tunnel. I’m nearly at the top of the mountain and wow the view up here is looking beautiful!!!